come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
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