That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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