we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
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