He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Randomize
