My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
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