I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Randomize
