This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
did you just send me my own nude
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
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