I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
Randomize
