thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
