So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
