wake up i wanna do it froggy style
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Randomize
