Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
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