I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
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