a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
Randomize