And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
You did what with his pubic hair?
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
