Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Also, beer. Big fan.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
