So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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