Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize
