maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
