Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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