i barfeds in our rink
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
Randomize
