so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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