I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
Randomize
