I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize
