Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
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