too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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