we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
