when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
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