Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
