stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Randomize
