You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
