what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Randomize
