sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize
