you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Randomize