There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
