I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Randomize
