I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
Randomize
