I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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