Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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