you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
Randomize
