Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
