Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Randomize
