I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Randomize
