its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
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