stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
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