If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Randomize
