She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
I love how my cats smell like pot.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize
