We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Randomize
