Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Randomize
