why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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