at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
